Randomnity
21 Random questions I’d like answers to, just things that cross my mind every other day when I’m sitting at a table looking accross at a random dame wondering how the heck I got into this mess:
1. When a dudu accidentally climbs onto your shoe at home and you take it all the way to town and it jumps off at City Square… what happens to it? Does it join another colony or be there lamenting its misfortune till Mustapha the nose-picking conductor steps on it.
2. Why can’t I combine my 15/= airtime with other dude’s 39/= and we get enough for an sms to say “dude! where’s the party at???”
3. 6am in the morning, freezing cold shower… why can’t I just swallow a pill and VOILA! I’m squeaky clean? Spare me the trauma.
4. What’s the other 92% of our brain used for? I’d rather be empty-headed that have a useless mass.
5. Is there pork in heaven? I’m serious.
6. How sure am I that blue is blue? What if it’s red or purple and because someone told me in Kindergarten that it’s blue, I know it’s blue. What if they were colour blind?
7. What if Nibiru is really ending the world? That would be so cool.
8. Am I dreaming or am I awake? Also known as: Is my dream a reality or is my reality a dream?
9. Can you voluntarily hold your breath till you die? I’ve tried…
10. What happens at the precise moment you die? Does your consciousness like explode or just… vanish.
11. How come animals don’t get all these cancer and disorder issues? It’s always coxdiosis (I’m sure the spelling is wrong) or mad cow. Nothing like mammary-retention-disorder.
12. Can you sneeze your brains out if you tried hard enough? Coz the stuff we sneeze looks a little too eerily like brain matter…
13. Why’s the sky blue, sunsets red and what colour is water, really?
14. Define love. By all means, take your time.
15. Can babies understand each other? I’m sure they be there watching us make stupid faces and be thinking, “what a moron!”
16. How come we don’t have green people? Spare me, don’t tell me about genes, I’m sure some one can turn green…
17. Wind? Explain.
18. Can worms have worms? It’s only fair.
19. How come flies don’t get sick from the sh*t they be chilling in?
20. Can you really be bored to death? I’ve been close, but… dying for real?
21. …
Yup, that’s it for now. And yup, number 21 is a genuine question.
March 29th, 2008 at 8:17 pm
do sockies count for me on my own blog?? if so then sockies or boots or whatever!!! now, i also want to know whether there’s pork in heaven for real, it had better be there.
March 29th, 2008 at 8:58 pm
Dude, sockies? that’s just plain W.E.A.K man.
March 30th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
Um … I used to ask those questions before I gave up on becoming smart. You hang in there.
But if there is no pork in heaven, how can it be heaven?
21 is the one I ask the most.
Coccidiosis.
The Grinch was green! It’s because I’m Green, isn’t it?
March 30th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
Got my fucking URL wrong. My own URL!
March 30th, 2008 at 5:15 pm
first off, LOL.
now for the answers:
1.by the time it hitched a ride on your shoe, it definitely had some plot…
2.err, that question is rhetorical.
3.because for you, that pill would have to be extra special.
4.us geniuses use 10%, in other words you who is missing 2%,…
*shaking head sympathetically
5.of course, there’s pork in heaven! it’s the definition of paradise, no?
6.———-
7.you want to die at 29?!?
8.oh, you’re awake, alright!
9.———–
10.———-
11.they got those cancers.how sure are you they don’t?
12.terrible imagery you’re evoking here.
13.if you did physics at any level, surely you can answer that?!
14.Love is……(DK dear, the definition is subjective)
15.yep, babies understand each other.they have universal knowledge until the age of 2 when they cross over.(refer to the movie Baby Geniuses)
16.———
17.what’s to explain? it’s pretty straightforward, is wind.
18. and 19. LOL
20.obviously not, judging from the length of this comment.
Random dame and mess. How do you pick your dates? It appears that they re-emphasize your missing 2%.
March 30th, 2008 at 9:21 pm
Princess princess, must thou begin a war of the geniuses? Too many disses thrown my way in that lengthy comment.
March 31st, 2008 at 9:56 am
princess has began blogging in the comments section, is that allowed?? just asking. me all i want to know is whether there is pork in heaven, thats all.
March 31st, 2008 at 10:08 am
Water is clear, dude! COLOURLESS!! See through!
March 31st, 2008 at 10:44 am
Alaaaaa!!!!! heaven without pork must be extremely boring beyond reasonable doubt. In that case i need to pack my own on my way there….but first i need to call Mobutu Ssekoseko to find out about it. haaa haaaa!!!!!
March 31st, 2008 at 11:14 am
@Tamble, who says water is colorless, its all an illusion of the mind this whole color thing. what are the odds we are all just colorblind, God playing one of those pranks on us, we get to heaven and its all different.
@George, i hope he will let us pack our own, me i’ll just carry whole pigs to heaven.
March 31st, 2008 at 11:46 am
DK, you didn’t bite.’tis a right pity that.
TE: you tell me if it’s allowed. it IS your blog, no?
March 31st, 2008 at 12:02 pm
No worries princess. I so bit, just takin my time munchin.
March 31st, 2008 at 2:49 pm
hmmm…