living la vida loca
Good afternoon boys and girls.
Ever had one of those days when you just needed some… drama in your life. When things just were not exciting enough? When you needed to add that extra spark in your life? When you just… you get the drift.
Well, ladies and gentlemen, for your consideration, I present, in seven easy examples, “Living la Vida loca, ala DK“.
Example 1
Jump on a boda boda with a 20 litre jerrycan of petrol. Tell the guy to head to Juba. Tell him yes, the one in Sudan.
Example 2
Wake up at 3am, go out and look for a pack of wild dogs. Count them, make sure there are more than five. Kick one.
Example 3
Get your best outfit. Rip it to shreds. Throw it out in the mud and stamp on it a few times. Wear it. Head to work. Actually, head to church.
Example 4
Walk into Serena during dinner time with a kaveera. Head over to their most expensive restaurant. Pick up one of the plates that are always on the tables. Loudly ask the waiter to bring you a fork, while making a lot of noise about it. Pour your beans, posho and binyeebwa from the kaveera onto the plate. Sit on the floor. Eat calmly.
Example 5
Buy a new padlock or something (preferably Solex). Wake up bright and early on a Monday morning. Head to the office. Lock up the office from the outside. Put up a KCC notice saying “Locked due to violation of trading license regulations.” Head to the beach. Switch your phone off. Have a CV ready.
Example 6
In the middle of a board meeting, start sniffing the air like someone just let loose. Continue sniffing, going around the room till you reach the Chairman. Balefully stare at him. Sniff pause sniff pause sniff… pause. Move closer to him/her. Sniff once. Choke. Run out the room holding your mouth like you’re gonna throw up. Again, have a CV ready.
Example 7
Walk into a supermarket or pharmacy when it’s super crowded. Go to the cashier, look her in the eye. Smile wickedly. Ask for Rough Rider condoms. Extra large. Put on a pair of gloves. Tear open one condom thingie from the pack she hands you, pull out the condom. Proceed to analyze it, measure it, stretch it. Throw it in the trash, push the pack back to her and ask her if they have them in XXL.
July 28th, 2009 at 3:20 pm
The measure of success manifests itself when one can be away from life and still make a momentary return to win socks!!!
I know, bunch or nonsense.
But socks.
I hope I still have them.
July 28th, 2009 at 3:44 pm
Example 6! off to do this to a lecturer………
July 28th, 2009 at 5:36 pm
kale, 4 and 5 are on for me.
July 28th, 2009 at 6:29 pm
And the main example is to just write down the drama… makes for good reference on those days when…
July 28th, 2009 at 8:51 pm
Hehehehe, those egg-samples over here are just crazy…
July 28th, 2009 at 11:13 pm
oh these had me in stitches!
July 29th, 2009 at 8:59 am
Have that CV ready….hehehe…
July 29th, 2009 at 9:33 am
Lol! You need to have a CV ready for all the cases of madness!
July 29th, 2009 at 10:00 am
Example 4 is killing me..
July 29th, 2009 at 10:13 am
No.5 is awesome and totally doable! These are funny!
July 29th, 2009 at 11:01 am
Number 2 is crazy - u could end up barking like a dog.
July 29th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
nya ha ha.
no. 7: people alreay find it hard to order for cds without that much drama naye this?…whoa!
example 4: LMAO!!!
July 29th, 2009 at 1:50 pm
if i get fired i am coming to work for you.
July 29th, 2009 at 1:56 pm
hahahahahhahhhahahahahhahahahahahha
i have died!
IM SO DOIN NO.1 ON MY WAY HOME TODAY!!!!!!!!!!
ur the winner! can i be your frend??
July 30th, 2009 at 2:19 pm
dude,this is sick sick siiick!!!!!i love the serena thing…
July 30th, 2009 at 4:51 pm
DK will you Marry me
…………………………….today is my one those days
September 7th, 2009 at 6:33 pm
No. 7 is a killer..i wonder if there is a man alive that can pull it off though..